I have been depressed at one point of time some 5 years ago. So I understand that depression is not a simple phenomena where it is easy to establish causal relationships. But one of the reason why we tend to get depressed is because we tend to compare ourselves to others.
Recently, I was talking to a close friend of mine . She was asking me about how I studied to crack IIT-JEE and what kind of work I used to do. I told her as a matter of fact, how I used to study in a productive manner and work consistently. All of a sudden she started crying.
This came as a shocker to me. After calming her, I asked her why did she cry all of a sudden. The answer really surprised me.
She said that she feels bad whenever she sees achieving more than her. She said that she hasn't achieved anything in life and she is not sure of the future. This answer was really shocking and sad from my perspective. In my perspective, this friend of mine has achieved a lot in life. She has excellent interpersonal skills, she is quick learner, jack of all trades, started earning since since her engineering days via managing events, played a sport at national level, an accomplished singer...
Compared to her only thing I did better is academics. But the Indian society has started placing too much value in academics. Anyway, I am digressing....
The thing is if we keep comparing ourselves with others, we can never be happy as there is someone or other who will do better than us. Even after nearly five years after my graduation I haven't achieved the goals I set for myself. Many of my classmates have settled down and are set the career they have carved a niche for themselves. If I keep comparing myself with them, it will be a very difficult journey for me. But if I focus on myself and how to achieve my goals...I will be able to appreciate the progress I made and work towards a fulfilling life.
We should have a positive life where we are focused on ourselves. We should appreciate others achievements but never compare ourselves with others. Everyone has a different journey. We should travel our own unique journey and try to enrich our lives in our own unique manner. Ultimately, success is not calculated by money, cars, marks or wealth...it is calculated by whether we lived a happy, fulfilling and content lives.
Recently, I was talking to a close friend of mine . She was asking me about how I studied to crack IIT-JEE and what kind of work I used to do. I told her as a matter of fact, how I used to study in a productive manner and work consistently. All of a sudden she started crying.
This came as a shocker to me. After calming her, I asked her why did she cry all of a sudden. The answer really surprised me.
She said that she feels bad whenever she sees achieving more than her. She said that she hasn't achieved anything in life and she is not sure of the future. This answer was really shocking and sad from my perspective. In my perspective, this friend of mine has achieved a lot in life. She has excellent interpersonal skills, she is quick learner, jack of all trades, started earning since since her engineering days via managing events, played a sport at national level, an accomplished singer...
Compared to her only thing I did better is academics. But the Indian society has started placing too much value in academics. Anyway, I am digressing....
The thing is if we keep comparing ourselves with others, we can never be happy as there is someone or other who will do better than us. Even after nearly five years after my graduation I haven't achieved the goals I set for myself. Many of my classmates have settled down and are set the career they have carved a niche for themselves. If I keep comparing myself with them, it will be a very difficult journey for me. But if I focus on myself and how to achieve my goals...I will be able to appreciate the progress I made and work towards a fulfilling life.
We should have a positive life where we are focused on ourselves. We should appreciate others achievements but never compare ourselves with others. Everyone has a different journey. We should travel our own unique journey and try to enrich our lives in our own unique manner. Ultimately, success is not calculated by money, cars, marks or wealth...it is calculated by whether we lived a happy, fulfilling and content lives.
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